March 15, 2017

Blankie and Binkie

By Tammy Derouin

It seems like whining and crying has become the favored pastime for many people. I didn't hear this kind of senseless bellyaching or see these kinds of tears and temper tantrums when I used to take my girls to daycare. But then again, the daycare/learning center I used didn't put up with such nonsense. As the older, yet preschool aged children, grew and learned how to socially interact, certain behavior was expected. Rules were in place with appropriate consequences for those who needed the occasional reminder.

We encourage children to develop skills which allow them to take care of their own needs. It doesn't matter to the child if more than half the food lands down the front of them or on the wall and floor. What's important to them is that they are trying to do it themselves. Their encouragement to succeed is the desire to eat. Eventually, more lands in the target area. They're happy they can do it. You're happy you don't have to do it and the mess they make eventually dwindles, hopefully. No matter how many times they fail, they never give up. They want to do “it” themselves.

It would be crazy to discourage independence. Have you ever witnessed a parent or caregiver discourage a child from eating with utensils, drinking from a cup or insist on the diaper over the potty? That would be insane! We want our children to grow and learn, to stand on their own two feet. Each challenge they face prepares them for the next one. It's exciting to watch as they realize they have achieved a new skill.

With new skills come new challenges. We can't wait for them to talk but then struggle to keep them quiet. We teach them to walk and then spend years running after them. We want them to think and figure things out for themselves but go toe to toe when they are making the wrong decision. As they learn, they also discover freedom. It doesn't take long before they push and test their limits. They quickly understand, upon achieving a new skill, that it reduces their dependency.

As they develop into older children and young adults, there is hope that the lessons they've learned will pay off as they make their way into the real world. But, there's the problem. Far too many children in our far too liberal society have been told that everyone is a winner. Too many awards have been handed out for so little achievement. In the real world, not everyone makes the team, gets the desired job or lives their fantasy dream. Did anyone stop to think about the downside of wrapping the kids in bubble wrap and handing everyone a trophy?

We are creating an overly sensitive and dependent society. People, young people, are being conditioned that they cannot function or they are not capable of achieving something because of, what? Fill in the blank. There is an excuse for everything. The fault will always belong to someone else. After all, a generation grew up watching the president assign blame and promote dependency. Personal responsibility has been discarded for a blankie and a binkie.

Life is not fair. You get hurt and you will struggle. Life is far from easy but in this great country of ours, your life belongs to you. You have the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Happiness is not a guarantee but you have the right to chase after whatever you think will make you happy. Nobody can control how they came into this world but in the United States, you have the freedom to attempt to change your circumstances.

The absolute failure of our educational system has been on full display for several months. If students don't get what they want they throw a temper tantrum. They whine, cry and disrupt those who have a different opinion. Words, speech, pictures and history are just too offensive for their delicate sensitivities. Reality is too intense for them. Instead of turning out individuals who are capable of dealing with loss, failure or disappointment, the educational system has constructed a U-turn. All the basic skills which were the foundation to further their independence were used to walk and talk themselves right back to their blankie and binkie at the daycare.

It is truly sad but I also think it's criminal that the history of the United States is no longer a priority. The Department of Education has robbed at least one generation of knowledge when it comes to our history. If people understood the history of the United States and how fortunate they are to live here, people wouldn't be protesting and saying they are oppressed, in the land of the free.

“The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.”

Benjamin Franklin